Need to Know Basis

What do you do when you have people in your life that you truly care about but they refuse to tell you what's wrong? I've had my fair share at this and I've handled it differently every time.

1. One of the Violets calls and just wants to come by. Not a problem although we haven't particularly talked very much outside of sorority stuff so I was a little confused. Nonetheless, everyone is welcome at the Dollhouse. I could tell that she was going through something but I never forced it. Maybe she just needed to get away. I'm usually or was formerly known as one of the mean Big Sisters but it was never in reality. We sat in quiet and watched TV. Just glad that I could help her escape from whatever it was that was bothering her. She's like the sunshine today. Although I wanted to know back then - I didn't need to know.

2. Friend calls me up and just wants to come over and talk. She makes it over and has on these huge designer sunglasses for no apparent reason and sits down on the couch. As soon as the glasses come off, here comes the waterworks. She unfolded her man issues to me and at the time I really couldn't sympathize because she knowingly put herself into a bad situation but it still hurt to see her such an emotional mess. I never judged her based on what she told me, but afterwards I mentioned that I saw the guy out and that I had spoke (just said Hi) and she lashed out at me. #REALLY I didn't need to know any of this but now that I knew, I didn't want to know.

3. I knew that a guy was the wrong person for one of my friends and I told her all that I knew but they entered into a relationship anyway. Of course he hated me and then it turned out that she and I stopped talking. I just let it go because I can't fight with love. I figured that was how it was meant to be - they later got married and had a baby. 7 years later she calls me to talk. The bastard used to abuse her and now they are getting a divorce. I know now (and honestly I knew back then)but I just don't want to believe it.

4. Before my grandmother passed, she had a stroke. My family decided not to tell me because I was away at school and when I got the phone call saying that I better come home because they didn't know how much longer she was going to live I was furious and hateful. I couldn't believe that they had kept something like this from me knowing that my grandmother was my heart. I needed to know.

Now I have a friend who's seems as if they are being eaten alive by life's woes but I have no idea as to what is going on. We truthfully haven't been friends for very long but once I put you into my friend circle, it takes some serious undoing for me to remove you. I try to give some general encouraging words and give my personal testimony but really what do I know about their issues. The bigger issue is that their unknown issues (to me) are starting to affect my life. I'm worried about them and constantly wondering about what the next day will bring but it seems like I'm on a need to know basis. Let's see how this unfolds...